He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
