I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Randomize
