please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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