let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
