My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
