Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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