You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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