I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
