Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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