cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
