Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
