I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
