it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
