You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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