He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
