Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize