yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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