He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
