you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
