On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
My vagina just clenched in fear
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
