we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
