matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
no, he came in my armpit
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize