Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
