I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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