Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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