you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize