woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
