Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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