I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
