I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
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