just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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