problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
