I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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