So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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