Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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