If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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