sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
