Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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