No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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