i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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