It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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