are you so shy because you have an std?
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
