Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
