I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize