be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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