She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Randomize
