Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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