mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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