let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
