I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize